Reaping flowers and Vegetables

A few weeks ago, my wife had this crazy idea that she wanted a garden just like her home in India. I am like there goes another case of 'Just like in India'. But not the one to say no, I agreed. The experience that followed was an eye opener.(Please read eye as wallet.)

So we went to Home Depot and began looking for flowers and pots to hold them. I almost fainted at the price of each flower plant and the pots. I saw this bunch of Mums for $5. The only place I am going to spend my five dollars are at Subway where any foot long sub is now only $5. I said that to her and she replied we can have our dinner today at Subway. It was Saturday and we are vegetarians on Saturday. I was in no mood for Veggie Delight. I understood well that I should listen to what she wants and avoid the trouble of having to do something that I don't want.

So she picked some mums, gazanias, violets and other flower plants that I have no idea what they are. Not to be left out, I said what about some vegetables. So were added kung pao peppers, violet bell peppers and vine tomatoes. I was like these should be enough let’s check out.

She says no no no no no. I don't want my flowers in these tiny containers. We need some nice flower pots and also some big trays for your vegetables she said. OK let’s go I say hurrying her to the pots section. We bought about 5 porcelain pots for some indoor decorative plants we already had, 4 plastic big pots for the flowers and three 18 inch trays one for the vegetables and two for flowers. Did you know that the trays in white are more expensive than the trays colored brown? Damn you racist color biased Home Depot shouted my inner self.

So I say again let’s check out. She says no no no no no. We need potting soil. The soil that we have with pots is not enough. The plants will die in a day on transplanting she says. She had a point. But who on earth in India buys mud and soil. Wasn't the whole point to have a life style like in India? She says our family always bought it. I thought my family was smart not to buy mud. We have enough soil in our backyard for plants. But I was hungry and did not want to start a losing fight. I also thought how much can a soil cost. All they have to do is package free soil in a plastic bag. A dollar at most, I guess. Was I WRRROOONNNNGGGG.

There are hundreds of soil types - garden soil, potting soil, 3 month, 4 month, everlasting, 1cf, 2cf, 5cf etc. And none of them was close to a dollar I estimated earlier. I picked two 1cf bags that weighed about 15 lbs each and put them on the cart. I said is there anything else. Nope we can go now unless you want more flowers she says. My response was No thank you we can go now. I fainted again as the register was ringing into 3 digits. Home Depot was hearing the sweet sound of cha ching while I was paying for mud.

By the time we reached home it was 3PM. We had our lunch on our way home. It took almost 3 more hours to transplant all the plants in the pots and trays. We also shouted and scolded each other as to why each of us was doing wrong. After 2 hours, I guess she was tired of planting the virtual garden or was tired of my incessant knowledge transfer of gardening skills and how to do them right. She left me on the balcony and never came back leaving me to finish my vegetables. I planted them all and went to be bed tired that night.

The next day I was talking to my friend and told him about my gardening expedition. He mocks me 'What? Are you going to reap flowers?’ I don't know but I hope to see some flowers in my wife's hand and atleast a pepper in my food for 120 bucks.

I did see some flowers and the peppers coming out today after about a month. I also saw some flower plants die and the peppers infested with achids. That's my next episode to get rid of those tiny slimy achids. I never thought I will be a farmer which was my ancestral occupation. I guess I have to now, if I am to see something out of investment.

Pure Vegetarian?

Last week my wife received a phone call from a friend whom she invited to visit us for dinner. My wife’s friend gave a courtesy call to confirm that her husband and herself will not be coming on Saturday but can make it on Sunday. My wife makes her favorite chicken curry and biryani on Sunday which is a customary habit brought over from her family. So she asked casually if they eat chicken. That was it. I could hear a barrage of hysteric cry on the phone from the other side. The cry was so loud that I could overhear her from a tiny cell phone that my wife was talking through while we were driving through a noisy intersection.

I know this post of mine will catch the nerves of some, but it does catch my nerve whenever I hear them say this - 'I am a 100% pure vegetarian' and they ramble about hysterically as to what should not be in their food as if the whole world out there is conspiring to get them to eat meat. I mean what does the phrase ‘100% pure vegetarian’ mean anyway.

If the above Para has some of you vegetarians fuming, sorry this is not meant to hurt every vegetarian out there. But please read through for what I am saying. I understand and respect your way of life. You want to be vegetarian whatever your reason might be. Good for you.

There seems to this superior feeling that they belong to higher strata in society fizzled by the Hindu theory of quad structured society and the top of it being the vegetarian sect. This sense of standing on a higher pedestal makes them look down upon us meat eating non-vegetarians that are bent on bringing them down to our level by contaminating their food with Non-Veg. Sorry to put a brake on your fast moving fancy dreams but there is no such conspiracy. You can have you veggies and leave our meat alone.

But what exactly does 100% pure vegetarian mean. Isn't 100% mean absolute pure that you have to qualify the 100% pure. Somebody is poor with maths. So is it % based on time or ingredients. This is what I mean. I eat veggies 5 days a week. Does that make me 71% pure? Or doesn't that qualify. If someone eats diary products like milk and cheese vegans don’t consider them vegetarians. So those of you who consume diary products are 82% pure vegetarians and vegans are 100%.

If you put the factoring of %s aside, socializing with some of these becomes a nightmare. I had a friend that I used to go out with. He had consumed chicken and beef before for a long time, but coming from a family of vegetarians, his sister took an oath to never to eat meat when he came to USA. Doesn't it seem like Manoj Kumar's movie and all so touching? Yes the story is touching but not socializing with him. So every time I went to have lunch/dinner to a restaurant, it was the same story. He would begin the order with 'I am a 100% pure vegetarian. I don't eat chicken, no beef, no pork, no fish, and no eggs'. He would go on and on enumerating all the animals, with his fingers out and counting them that would possibly be eaten by the lowly meat eating people. God! The guy taking an order would look at me and I would try hard to not meet my eyes with him and sometimes hide under the table to avoid embarrassment. It is even more hilarious if the restaurant was Chinese. After all his rambling there would be egg in his fried rice and pork in his spring roll.

For those of you who do not what kind of vegetarian you are a quick Google on types of vegetarian will provide the following classification and some say you can say vegetarian only if you are vegan.
Pescatarian
Flexitarian/Semi-vegetarian
Lacto-ovo- vegetarian
Lacto-vegetarian
Ovo-vegetarian
VeganRaw
Vegan
Macrobiotic
Fruitarian

So next time please specify what kind of vegetarian you are or just say you are a vegetarian. We all know what you mean. You do not need to qualify 100% and pure.

But the vegetarians have their own problems that I am fully aware of. I am a forced vegetarian for 2 days a week. Dont ask me why? It will be one of those movie stories albiet a cliched chick movie at that. Married men have to make a lot of sacrificies to keep the lady happy. The options to vegetarians dining out is very limited. The standard is Taco Bell with the order being 'Chalupa replace meat with beans por favor'. At BK it is the Veggie burger and at subway the Veggie delight. You need 2 footlongs of those Veggie delights from Subway to satisfy your hunger. There is also Qdoba that have veggie burritos and my favorite is Mexican Gumbo. If you have tried it, you should. It is like Indian sambar rice, only it is Mexican and very tasty. The list seems to be long enough but if you think about it for a minute not every place you live or work has all the 4 places I mentioned above. In most cases you have at most one of them and you are stuck with eating the same thing over and over again.